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I'm curious... You know those times where you're heart tells you to do one thing, but your head tells you to do the complete opposite? Could be with love, career or other life choices. Which do most witches choose? I used to be someone who always followed their head until I had a major enlightenment one day years ago, changed my life around & started to follow my heart... Led to the biggest changes & the happiest I've ever been, the funny thing was as soon as I stopped following my heart at the time, it was like my path just literally ended. Do you understand what I mean? My magick stopped being as successful (apologies for spelling magick as magick, I just prefer it) whereas before there was always something, I was torn in half & it was because I chose to stop following my heart & follow logic instead. I allowed FEAR (good lord, us witches should know better) to stand in my way. Led to dark night of the soul, etc, etc, was awful & lasted 18 months or so. Wasn't in the best position either, everything went to complete shit in my life the moment I chose the "logical" choice. I ended up moving home & all sorts to start over. I'm steadily trying to get back onto a new path in life now which is different because I cannot return to my original since the other person involved is now long gone & moved on. However it really made me reflect that if our ability to have free will is completely contradicted by our path of calling, then we are left with two separate choices - either live a lie, or don't. And if the things we love are already predestined then that would mean that using our "free will" is counter-intuative & instead using our INTUITION & "love" (which seems in fact source energy flowing through the heart chakra...) to be who we are intended to be. Everything we do is out of love, whether we teach someone a lesson or help them. But I feel a total idiot at times for following my heart... I do some crazy shit, let me tell you. No drugs, alcohol or sex involved. I ended up in the wilderness living out of a tent for a year. I met the man I thought I'd always wanted & then lost him because I refused to admit he was real. I met fae for the first time & ended up in some weird copse miles out that everyone said had strange energy in there. I nearly died several times on this crazy excursion which went 240 miles on foot, though I stayed in areas for months at a time. The story is long & at the end I was left stranded on a boat out in the middle of the countryside by a drug using man (not my lover) who'd used & betrayed me for access to my resources. Revealed all of his traits & now he has been condemned by everyone & he's in the middle of losing everything because he's committed a lot of serious misdeeds towards a lot of people. So... There's more, but I shan't bore you all. Back to topic... How do witches fare? I'm going back to following my heart & intuition which I believe is the true self, but it's really tricky because it's still trying to argue with the "very human" logical aspect of my mind... But I'm past it & to be frank, I don't feel particularly human, especially not with autism. I simply want to move on in life. I'm prepared to take risks & lose everything. After a lifetime of back & forthing between heart & logic... Logic just doesn't make sense anymore. Any friends here who can relate?