I have tried different approaches, and I have been most cordial, along with offerings, payment (blood, water, food, alcohol, etc.), but each time, the working goes south ie. the working does not 'work',and I do not feel any warm fuzzy feelings of contact.
When I rely on myself to draw the raw powers, make a sacrifice (my blood), the working is successful.
How many times does one have to go down a street to find a house, but does not find it because it simply is not there. I really have to stop trying this street. M, mentioned the Beloved Dead, but it looks like I do not have any. I invite any spirits/ancestors that are beneficial to me, the success of my working (after all, I do not want a sociopath or an abuser showing up). Prior to that I banish any spirits that would be detrimental. There is protection in place.
I have tried to build that 'relationship' long before doing a working, to demonstrate that I am not just 'using' them.
Well, what can I expect, if the relationship did not exist in a positive way when living, how could it be any different when they are dead!
I guess it is just not my path, as it was not when they lived. I extricated myself from that years ago, although the scars still exist, and act up now and then.
Can I find 'some' good memories - sure, but the bad far outweighs it.
Want the job done right, do it yourself. Relatives - bah, humbug.
Hi Autumn Moon,
This is a very interesting topic, and before delving into the argument I wanted to enlarge on your experiences. I have had for times similar problems, where does not matter what I did, I could just not feel they were there, their presence was not available to me - no matter I hard I wanted to tap into it. I think there are two things that motivated this, and that have changed allowing me to contact my loved ones who have passed away. First, is that the thing has to go both way. I think, as you specify in another topic, that if you did not have a positive relation with whomever you are calling on, I do not see why they would be willing to come. I do not know if spirits are there in their own right or if they are just the manifestation of the memories and energy we hold for them, but even in this last case, horrible memories of one person can be a deterrent enough to effectively summon that person. Second, I find it more difficult to change your relation with the dead if you have lost someone who was close to you. If you are not one of those open-as-the-arc-de-triomphe medium who would see dead people at the corner of the street, it will be difficult to reach the dead if you do not have a link there. Since my beloved grandmother died, she has been my gate-keeper for conversing with the dead. She works as an intermediary, and because our bond was so tight, it has been much easier to access spirits through her. Then of course it may be that you are just not that kind of person, but I personally would not give up so easily. When you practice magic, the more allies you can have on other planes, the better your back is watched.
Regarding the subject of 'divination with dead', I do this with tarot. With time, I elaborated a particular spread (which I call the Dead Man Spread), in which the reader works as a medium drawing the cards for the dead person. I find this most effective, at least as effective as automatic writing and other forms of conversation.
La strega è un frutto di terra. (M.)