Posted 23 October 2011 - 04:21 AM
Would you say that discovering one's personal power might come as part of a process that includes perhaps deities, spirits, ancestors, elements, personal power? For instance, when I first looked into the craft, it was through Wicca, and I relied heavily on my relationships with various deities and the elements for power for spells. I didn't really think I had any personal power. Then I began looking into just the elements, since I'm heavily nature based. Helpful, but in the process, I learned that I had my own power that I could raise and direct (even if I didn't know exactly how to do so effectively, often resulting in some uncomfortable and over-powering experiences before I grounded). Once in a while, I'll refer to my patronesses for added oomph.
Tonight, after reading several posts about how some of you work with ancestors, I started thinking about that avenue as well. It's a little vague for me, because I'm adopted and the family I know about were NOT witchy whatsoever. Since I've been having trouble with my runes, I asked for my ancestors to guide me. I also used as a "field" a school chalk slate that one of my adopted ancestors used with his name etched in the slate. He was from my adopted dad's side of the family. I felt a presence that someone had "stepped forward" so to speak, and the reading was not only simple, but incredibly accurate (where usually my attempts at rune divination have been vague and unsatisfying, like I just couldn't get it). And it was incredibly positive. I thanked my ancestor, and felt a warm sensation against my left ear, like I was getting a hug.
Each of my different experiences with different sources of power highlighted a kind of relationship with the source. With my patronesses, I worked with them in order to discover magic and power, and to explore some areas of spirituality that I hadn't considered before (many of my patronesses are crones). Working with the elemental energies helped me understand the interconnected nature of nature. Learning my personal power (catalyzed by my emotions) helped me focus and learn to direct energies and emotions. And my first real experience with my ancestors (even if I don't know who it was - could have been the one who owned the school slate) helped me with divination. I willingly admit that I'm a total noob at this, and that I have much to learn. All of my sources (even my personal power) teach me as much as they aid my workings.
"Run mad as often as you choose; but do not faint."