CelticGypsy Posted January 18, 2011 Share Posted January 18, 2011 The Darwin's are out !! Yes, it's that magical time of year again when the Darwin Awards are bestowed, honoring the least evolved among us. Here is the glorious winner : 1. When his 38 caliber revolver failed to fire at his intended victim during a hold-up in Long Beach, California, would-be robber James Elliot did something that can only inspire wonder. He peered down the barrel and tried the trigger again.This time, it worked ! 2. The chef at a hotel in Switzerland lost a finger in a meat cutting machine and after a little shopping around, submitted a claim to his insurance company. The company expecting negligence sent out one of its men to have a look for himself. He tried the machine and he also lost a finger. The chef's claim was approved. 3. A man who shoveled snow for an hour to clear a space for his car during a blizzard in Chicago returned with his vehicle to find a woman had taken the space. Understandably, he shot her. 4. After stopping for drinks at an illegal bar, a Zimbabwean bus driver found that the 20 mental patients he was suppose to be transporting from Harare to Bulawayo had escaped. Not wanting to admit his incompetence, the driver went to a nearby bus stop and offered everyone waiting there a free ride. He then delivered the passengers to the mental hospital, telling the staf that the patients were very excitable and prone to fantasies.. the deception wasn't discovered for 3 days. 5. An American teenager was in the hospital recovering from serious head wounds received from an oncoming train. When asked how he received the injuries, the lad told police that he was simply trying to see how close he could get his head to a moving train before he was hit. 6. A man walked into a Louisiana Circle-K, put a $20 bill on the counter, and asked for change. When the clerk opened the cash drawer, the man pulled a gun and asked for all the cash in the register, which the clerk promptly provided. Then man took the cash from the clerk and fled, leaving the $20 bill on the counter. The total amount of the cash he got from the drawer.... $15. [ If someone points a gun at you and gives you money, is a crime committed?] 7 Seems an Arkansas guy wanted some beer pretty badly.. He decided that he'd just throw a cinder block through a liquor store window, grab some booze, and run. So he lifted the cinder block and heaved it over his head at the window. The cinder block bounced back and hit the would-be thief on the head, knocking him unconscious. The liquor store window was made of plexiglass. The whole event was caught on videotape. 8. As a female shopper exited a New York convenience store, a man grabbed her purse and ran. The clerk called 911 immediately, and the woman was able to give them a detailed description of the snatcher. Within minutes, the police apprehended the snatcher. The put him in the car and drove back to the store. The thief was then taken out of the car and told to stand there for a positive I.D. To which he replied, " Yes officer, that's her. That's the lady I stole the purse from ". 9. The Ann Arbor News crime column reported that a man walked into a Burger King in Ypsilanti, Michigan at 5 a.m., flashed a gun, and demanded cash. The clerk turned him down because he said he couldn't open the cash register without a food order. When the man ordered onion rings, the cleark said they weren't available for breakfast. The man, frustrated, walked away. [ *A 5 Star Stupidity Award Winner ] 10. When a man attempted to siphon gasoline from a motorhome parked on a Seattle street, he got much more than he bargained for. Police arrived at the scene to find a very sick man curled up next to a motorhome near spilled sewage. A police spokesman said that the man admitted to trying to steal gasoline, but he plugged his siphon hose into the motorhome's sewage tank by mistake. The owner of the vehicle declined to press charges saying that it was the best laugh he'd ever had. In the interest of bettering mankind, please share these with friends and family... unless of course one of these individuals by chance is a distant relative or long lost friend. In that case, be glad they are distant and hope they remain lost. ****~~~ Remember ~~~****.... They walk among us !! **** Regards,Gypsy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vixen Posted January 18, 2011 Share Posted January 18, 2011 The last one had me in stitches thank!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Whiterose Posted January 18, 2011 Share Posted January 18, 2011 :roflhard: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gloogal Posted January 18, 2011 Share Posted January 18, 2011 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Firebird Posted January 18, 2011 Share Posted January 18, 2011 PMSL :vhappywitch: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Babooshka Posted January 18, 2011 Share Posted January 18, 2011 haha! i love that! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Oakbuchanan Posted January 18, 2011 Share Posted January 18, 2011 Thanks for the smile Gypsy ;) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MissTree Posted January 18, 2011 Share Posted January 18, 2011 :rofl::roflhard: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paula Posted January 18, 2011 Share Posted January 18, 2011 Fantastic :applause: Definitely the best laugh I've had all day :D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mountain Witch Posted January 18, 2011 Share Posted January 18, 2011 And people wonder why I tend to be a hermit! :rofl: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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