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Is secrecy still important to you?


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#141 Blossom

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Posted 05 September 2016 - 02:50 PM

Secrecy is of the upmost importance for me. Broken secrecy can interfere with true intent in my opinion a little like the saying "To many chefs in the kitchen can ruin the broth". Secrecy also teaches me discipline. My family are aware of the surface stuff but that is as far as it goes. x


Edited by Blossom, 05 September 2016 - 02:50 PM.

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#142 NamedForTheMoon

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Posted 06 September 2016 - 04:36 PM

Outside of my home, secrecy is important. I don't need other people knowing what I do (unless they are a witch themselves and can sense it in me, in which case it's just a nod from one witch to another). In my home, my husband knows. My children are too young, yet. My mother in law, who lives with us, is catholic, and I don't think she has any real idea of what I'm doing. But she travels, so when she's gone I don't care too much about hiding things.

 

My husband will ask questions. He'll see that I've done a spell or ritual, and he'll ask. I'll just say, "Oh, it's for this. Oh, it's for that." and he'll be like, "Oh, okay. Cool." But when he wants to know the specifics, like... The breaking down of the spell or ritual... That's when I'm like, "I can't really explain it to you..." because I know it will be lost on him, and I do feel that if I share that kind of knowledge with him that it somehow desecrates my workings. Maybe that's just me, though.


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#143 Anubha

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Posted 02 May 2017 - 09:16 PM

Secrecy is still important to me for various reasons;

 

1.) My ex-husband, who is on record as a cult member tried to use my former, fleeting interest in Wicca as a reason to take my children away from me. He also used this to turn people against me, saying I worshipped the devil and was trying to poison him. Fucking idiot.

 

2.) I don't hide my feelings well and when I am full-on enraged with someone, bad things often start happening to them. I have more control over this these days but people do notice sometimes and I wouldn't want to lose my job or be ostracized in other ways. Especially if people thought I was deliberately hexing them. Although, I have found the mystery around this quite useful.

 

3.) My two oldest children are skiddish of all things occult. I am confident in who I am at my age but still find it painful to have loved ones invalidate my experiences and beliefs. It's easier to keep most things to myself.


Edited by Anubha, 02 May 2017 - 09:46 PM.

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#144 witchinplainsight

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Posted 20 July 2017 - 11:27 AM

Good thread! I am not 'out' as a witch as it would be really frowned upon in my work where I live. I have my own study at home with a big cabinet where I keep my stuff. As our littlie gets bigger and can read I will have to decide about encryption but tbh there's a witchling in there waiting to get out so in some ways I would rather she could see stuff and ask questions. I'm not doing anything terribly dark, just learning the ropes at the minute so most of my notes are on books I've read, shamanic practice, and incense blends.

 

I would like to have somewhere to write more private notes on sigils etc - not sure what my husband would make of it all ^_^


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#145 kaenoir

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Posted 23 August 2017 - 10:11 PM

My practice has always been "secret". I guess not intentionally but i'm a fairly solitary person and prefer things the way they currently are.


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#146 Tricycle

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Posted 25 August 2017 - 02:57 PM

I prefer generally not to tell too many people about my beliefs, and especially not about the ins and outs of my practice. Except with my friend who is also trad, but even then, I don't get into specifics about spells, and neither does she. We talk about ingredients we like, or about the intentions of our spells, but not exactly how we did it. I'm sure if one of us was really stumped, we would probably brainstorm together the ins and outs, though. We also talk about how we figure out what the spell will be.

 

As for anyone else who doesn't know, I never lie about it, but I'm very good at talking 'around' it, if you know what I mean. I mentioned in another thread about my lovely Christian friend who's noticed a change and is trying to ask me what I am. There are lots of, 'what's changed?' questions. To which I ask, 'what do you mean?' which is a fair question, really! If I knew exactly which part she felt had changed, I could just talk around that bit :D

 

Most people see me as a nature lover, many would suspect I'm a pagan (which I class myself as, also), and I'm sure plenty would just dismiss some of my quirks as new-agey-ness. I'm more than happy to project a new age vibe if there's some aspect of myself that I couldn't hide, such as my incense in the house, or any crystals I might end up using or wearing. People know I'm a big fan of meditation, and I think they see that more as a health kick, again, I'm happy to let them, think that's as far as it goes. I mean, I did initially start meditation due to doctor's orders, and it does do wonders for my health. But anyone who doesn't know I'm on the trad path, doesn't need to know my meditation goes way beyond that.

 

I thought I might give examples of talking around the questions. Let's say if someone asked if I'm wiccan (that hasn't happened, but it's a good example). I would answer honestly, 'no, wicca is definitely not my thing'. But, because not everyone knows about trad craft yet, I would expect most people, if given that answer, would assume, 'oh, she's not a witch, then.' So, I haven't lied at all, but I have given the impression that I'm also not a witch. Also, as mentioned above, answering a question with another question has proved helpful, but I wouldn't think it'd be useful to ask question after question in return, ad nauseum, because then I think it draws suspicion and people start wondering what you're hiding!

 

Another thing I've found that helps, is I might mention that I have different beliefs to other people, but I like to keep them to myself, because I don't want to convert anyone, and I don't like it when people force their beliefs on others. It's not a lie, it's 100% true of me. People usually respect that, and leave it alone, but they don't seem to feel as though I've acted overly defensive or aggressive.


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#147 Holdasown

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Posted 25 August 2017 - 06:30 PM

My paganism is out in my home and I don't hide it when asked. Most would contribute my picking up rocks, bones and stuff to that. Especially since I'm Heathen. Even things like cards, runes, herbs and stuff they can contribute to that. I don't ever use the word witch except with my husband and two best friends. No one around here would get that and while most overlook what they might call pagan stuff I like they would not be friendly to that word. So I have my god and ancestor altars out in the open but my witch altar is in the bedroom and tucked away. I hope one day to be out of town and in a place and can have a witchy shed on the property and do all my workings there. 


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#148 Faolana

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Posted 16 September 2017 - 02:19 AM

Overall I'm a really open person; I'll always answer any questions asked of me and make my feelings clear, but with my craft I feel so strongly in the opposite. And it's not from a moral/ethical standpoint... I've just always felt that talking about my craft may somehow weaken it, or me. I'm very secretive about my spells/rituals- what I use, how I do them, whether or not they're successful. I've just been taught that they can lose their power if you speak about them.

 

It's becoming something I've had to think about much more now because my husband is a witch and while I'm open with him in every way, it still makes me uncomfortable to talk about what I'm doing or working on or why I'm using a specific herb or tool.

 

This whole thread is fascinating and parts of the discussion ended up touching on mundane issues I'm currently confronting-  I am becoming very keenly aware of how we now live in a culture of "If it wasn't posted on social media, it didn't happen". My desire to not tear others down publicly is causing me hardship and I really resent it.


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#149 westofthemoon

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Posted 17 September 2017 - 05:11 PM

I wanted to update my post. My friends know and my husband knows, but now I have to even hide it from my husband. He found some book I was trying to get rid of and freaked out, claiming I was being "brainwashed by some book telling me what to do"(hmm, didn't think I owned any bibles). So now I have to hide my practice from him too--and tbh it's very hard. But that's a rant for another time.

So yes -- secrecy is still very important to me. I do not enjoy people trying to convert me, constantly asking me to hex their enemies, wanting me to do work for them for free (that's another thread), conflating me with a dippy Wiccan or pagan they know, judging my personal choices or telling me I'm Evil and that if I choose witchcraft over a relationship with them I'm selfish and "deserve what's coming to me". End rant!

I don't want to come out of the broom closet. I did that when I was a pagan (to my family & friends) and all it does is have all the xtians constantly praying for your soul.

Edited by westofthemoon, 17 September 2017 - 05:14 PM.

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