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True Lies ...


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Greetings All


My favourite fun jokes are those that you must laugh at cause their truth will make you weep if you don't. Here is an old blart I did which I treasure like a cherished Frenemy ....


Lies Lies All Lies .....


Enjoy - or don't as the mood takes you!








Greetings All


Some thoughts for those who might have missed them.


Comedy ? Way in which truth may be dispensed to great effect.


Truth ? Way in which comedy dispenses with fact.


Fact ? The truth of comedy and the point at which comedy becomes true.


Wishes ? High in calories, low in protein.


Witchcraft "History" - Pointless to debate especially when so many

don't even say the word the same way these days.


Revisionism - a popular pastime for those with too little work to do.

A fun way to attract the ire and envy of those who are too busy



Fun ? State of hysteria difficult to earn and harder to dispel.


Ire ? Mispronunciation of "I'll" (As in I'll wrap this fact about

your ears!"


Envy ? Irritation at one's inability to steal the fortunes of others.


The last person you disagreed with - Unfortunate fact to be learnt from.


Witch vs Wicca vs Pagan etc - Largely pointless ... until of course

suddenly; legal definition is required due to the actions of public

relations - which isn't generally required with out the definition.


Witch ? Can't trust em unless you have dirt one them and they like



Wiccan ? Won't trust em unless of course they share Gods with you.


Sharing Gods ? Not nearly as fun as sharing sexual partners and not

as dangerous as sharing needles.


Pagan ? Used to trust them ? long ago when we were in the fields



Chicken and Egg - Philosophical noggin teaser that is irrelevant to

the "pragmatic KFC addict".


Legal definition - Not required by those who don't feel need to

justify themselves to outsiders.


Outsiders ? Whoever I keep secrets from ?.. read as everyone.


Justification ? Admission to the ranks of the popular and

fashionable ? heresy to the past.


Fashionable ? A book, an article, loads of purple crushed velvet and

many people who smile when you are in earshot.


Heresy ? Hear Say that is repeated ? often quickly to avoid public



Black and White - What too many people need in terms of history,

morals, actions and more worryingly as personal desires.


Razor blades in Candy - That someone may be a beatific healer and

guide does not necc. mean that they can't drive a knife through their

mother's throat for a profit.


Chocolate in the Beard - That someone may be a twisted piece of slime

with no more morals than last years chopped liver does not mean that

they can't drown while saving an infant from the surf.


Today's truth - Unfortunately in modern day, "club membership" tends

to equal self identification. Self identification is generally the

first step up from ignorance to new information. Self identification

means one can't choose one's family - only one's friends.


Self Identification ? Like G Strings, once the province of the

wonderfully ungodly legal aged that one would not bring home to

mother, now the very thing too many parents feel is OK for their

preteen daughters to own publicly.


Club Membership ? the Good guy badge one can enjoy between meals

without ruining one's appetite.


Dandruff ? Attempts at regulation are regularly the result of

irregular behaviour. Yours, theirs and mine.


Regulation ? Rule by All forms of Bran related news.


News ? What I want you to know and you will mistrust.


"The Federation(s)" ? Shields under which the likeminded can gather

to outlast the slings and arrows of those uninvited.


The Uninvited ? Required slingers and bow people to keep the

Federation in business ? and thereby the uninvited in some semblance

of status and employment.


Familiars - Those who one seems to acquire like old magazines,

through no desire on one's own part; due to the irritating need of

some to self identify as one's own cousin.


Kissing Cousin - When these same have something you want ... or want



Family - Large numbers of disconnected people we on principle don't

agree with, don't trust as much as ourselves and yet still feel a

need to smile at before we spit in their footprints.


Coveners ? Those who one worries about so much one can't abide the

sight of while still not being able to manage the danger of their



Friends close, Enemies closer ? What everyman believes (just not in

public) and every woman is born to act upon.


Maturity - Acknowledging that we ourselves are those we despise, that

we all condoned through lack of relevant information, through action

and inaction etc. Acknowledging that all of the above does not mean

anything in and of ourselves that we don't already know.


Acknowledging that what was was, is is and yet shall be should be

dictated by our best intentions and actions springing from an attempt

at objective learning from is and was. Acknowledging that we should

be ever mindful of the fact that a failure to forgive ourselves for

what we felt we might have been or done often tempts us to be more

harsh with the objects of our vision than we should - and vice versa.


Irrelevant of the unpleasant nature of this particular issue and time

of public laundering ? once again we are faced with a test wherein we

can either be who we are, or present ourselves as we feel people

might want us to be. History teaches us that the latter is ever the

precursor to that same action biting on our asses in unexpected ways.


The Best Bet ? Even Odds Favourite says that those who did one will

do the same and the others will again wonder why they didn't think of

it first.


(I did a week ago!)





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