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Hekabel

Differences in self since beginning to practise?

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@w.o.m.- does this mean if I keep saying I'm skinny again, that will happen, cause I really am on board with that plan...;)

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I've heard it works. I quit smoking once that way (by saying I wasn't a smoker, not that I was skinny lol).

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I want to clarify that the things I say that people say will get me locked up have NOTHING to do with "witch" stuff. Nothing. It is just that...I AM different. My sense of "right" and "wrong" is different. My basic worldview changed.

 

I am silent in general so so so much more than I ever was. That has been noted by people, too, with suspicion and reproof.  Even without words, my body language and facial expressions are different, and I laugh at different things.

 

Spiritual practices change people. They change you beyond your spiritual practice. You can never say a single word about what you are up to and people will still know you changed.

 

Silence is funny. When silent, you observe more. You connect to people and your environment differently. And when you do talk, people pay a lot more attention to what you do say, so you need to be extra aware of what you are saying.

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Yes, yes, to saying things about ourselves and having them happen.

 

That is what people are trying to tap into with affirmations.

 

It is a part of recovery for many victims to begin to declare who they are instead of others define them.

 

It is part of the "fake it till you make it" concept.

 

It can be a "spell".

 

I'm sure others know more far more about this than me. This puny and pathetic list just scratches the surface.

 

"I am...." is a powerful tool.

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You know, I suppose there is some pretty profound truth there. My original comment was just joking. However, in all honesty I suppose I have considered affirmations silly "I'm beautiful, I'm successful, I'm smart, blah blah blah". My thought being some things you just are- and there is no changing it. The other things take WORK. Affirmations I have relegated (without really thinking it through) to lazy and not likely to actually do anything. But, giving a tiny amount of consideration it becomes obvious to me that is not fair or accurate. Especially, as one who has had their self image damaged by others- some affirmations to oppose those influences would probably be a damn good idea:).

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One thing I have learned is that not everything silly people do is silly. Silly people do have an occasional good idea. Sometimes, though, that idea needs to be tweaked a bit, to scrape off the silly, and take advantage of the core foundation of it.

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I have become more self-confident, more trusting of my instincts and less bothered by what others think. I came across a woman at a meeting whose every other word was to undermine me, but I couldn't care less. I could see clearly that her only issue was with herself, and that everyone present most likely could see that as well. A few years back, I might have responded to her but now I prefer to see someone hoisted by their own petard than get into one upmanship with people who harbour insecurities. I am sure that this transformation has come to be since I began practising more seriously, because practising has brought to me a kind of deeper inner awareness of who I am and why I am here. Those are the things that matter the most.

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I like the phrase "Hoisted by their own petard"...Is that an English phrase or is it a Mistflower phrase?

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Thank you. I probably should have known that but I am not a big Shakespeare fan.

 

It is probably blasphemous to admit that.

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I looked up the word petard, so I know what it means.

 

But to me it sounds like a leotard, and I have this mental image. It is quite comical.

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Thank you. I probably should have known that but I am not a big Shakespeare fan.

 

It is probably blasphemous to admit that.

 

 

Belle, you're not alone, I also don't like Shakespeare. And now to wait for my alma mater to come take my English degree away. 

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Thank you Duchess!  I thought I was the only one, or rather the only one who would admit it.

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Nothing wrong in not liking something you're "supposed" to like, in my opinion. I do like Shakespeare but there's plenty of stuff I don't like that everyone says is amazing, edifying, renowned, and so on and so forth...... (by the way- I didn't know the petard saying came from Shakespeare as it's another of his phrases that has entered the general language - so didn't intend to go all Shakespearian there)!

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I used to read all the time, I was a book-a-holic. My husband at the time would lecture me about reading certain classics that he read and how I should read them and be a big smartypants like him. I didn't want to read them and I didn't have to read them and finally I told him to 'shut up' because I had only observed him to have read a single book in 20 years. All his 'big reading' had been done in college. He never brought that topic up again. 

 

That was off topic, sorry..As for differences in self since beginning to practice, they are extreme. I couldn't even answer that question. 

Edited by Belle

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Hamlet:

There's letters seal'd, and my two schoolfellows,
Whom I will trust as I will adders fang'd—
They bear the mandate, they must sweep my way
And marshal me to knavery. Let it work;
For 'tis the sport to have the enginer
Hoist with his own petard, an't shall go hard
But I will delve one yard below their mines
And blow them at the moon.

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r.e. The OP

 

Well, in all areas of life I am always learning and examining things from different perspectives. But as far a DIFFERENCES in myself since beginning practice that pertain or are a result of practice and the path-

I'd say it's more about awareness and less about change. Acknowledging and uncovering what was always there. Fanning a flame. Learning to regognize, acknowledge, and honor this me. The me that is not chained and covered by suffocating layers and senseless rules, placed on me by society, bad relationships, and worse myself.

And this is a work that I recognize will never be done, but continuing it is part of honoring what had once been hidden.

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Like many others, I was more timid/anxious/low confidence and now I feel powerful. I'm also much more self-reliant. I don't worry about death or the future much anymore. I feel grounded and whole.

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I've had a few breakthroughs lately and I have really become a person who doesn't take crap anymore. I feel much more confident and able to handle most things that come my way. I don't stress out about the things I had been stressing for a long time. You know what? This is who I was originally, I don't know what happened during my 20s but I somehow became broken. I feel back and better than ever now.

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Love this thread - it's full of great ideas.

 

I'm still new in my path but the biggest change is that I have stopped giving my rational brain full control over every aspect of life. I have always lived in my head.

 

This path is reconnecting me to nature and to other levels of knowing - intuition, energy and through journeying, other world. I am getting to know myself and how to work with my shadow side.

 

My only sadness is that while I love this forum I think I need to step back from it for a while. There is so much information I am like a greedy child in a sweet shop running from jar to jar. I think I need to take some time away from reading and learning (the living in my head bit) to actually doing. So thanks for everything so far :)

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