Jump to content
Sign in to follow this  
ArcticWitch

Do you make others nervous since you began practicing?

Recommended Posts

I've observed something rather disheartening the longer I embrace my Path.  I seem to intimidate others now, whereas I used to make folks feel at ease.  I can still calm these nervous adults if I project a soothing intent, but frankly, most times I don't see the point of using my energy to "smooth over" my effect on others.  In contrast, I'm actually able to connect with children for the first time in my life, and my already-established gift with animals has since expanded exponentially.

 

It's difficult for me to determine what exactly has changed that seems to inspire social anxiety about me, from both strangers and longtime friends.  Americans seem to have more and more tics these days- and as my own tics fade away, the people I'm interacting with will display more tics.  I'm obviously more confident the longer I'm on my Path, with zero tolerance for bullshit and increasingly fearless to buck etiquette and social trends, all of which will of course come across as intimidating for the 'average' person.  But this curious effect I have on others started very shortly after beginning my Path...which was before my Practice and personal development resolved a lifetime of self-esteem issues.  Is this simply the 'It' factor of magic and witches that has been discussed in other threads?  

 

know I'm not the only one to notice this, and am eager to hear of shared experiences.  :)

 

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

AW I have the same effect on people they seem to be kind of fearful of me which never used to happen but like you animals attract to me. I think maybe the stronger we get we must put off some kind of energy that has this affect on people bc most of us are able to feel other peoples energy so when we do it has an impact on their energy field around them. Just a theory. :thinking:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Yes, 'intimidate' is the right word for it. I can't tell you if it's something that began when I first took steps on the path or whether it's always been the case, all I know is I recognise it now. People never seem to be able to get completely comfortable in my presence. I've made efforts in becoming an approachable person (on bad days I can be very shy and avoidant- so automatically unlikable) but even if I tick all the right boxes there's that silent space in first impressions being filled up with something I can't pin point. Even when the first impression is finally shrugged off there's a bit of an after taste. I mean, it could just be me. There's a few things about my appearance, accent and manner that are uncommon. At the same time though, I just feel there is something else going on, like I'm being viewed from a distance and they don't want to come closer.

 

I get on well with children but that's more to do with the fact I haven't a problem thinking like one :P

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I think maybe the stronger we get we must put off some kind of energy that has this affect on people bc most of us are able to feel other peoples energy so when we do it has an impact on their energy field around them. Just a theory. :thinking:

 

Very interesting theory!  I've always been an empath, but before getting on Path I simply internalized what others were feeling/thinking.  I've since learned how to control that connection, and when dipping into their "flow" to get a sense of what's going on with someone, I guard myself from their energies flowing into me (unless I choose to allow it "in").  In lieu of your point, I think that boundary I've put in place is subconsciously sensed, which is a somewhat uncommon thing for someone to experience- hence an expected, normal reaction of being put on edge.

 

Going off an a tangent here, I had an interesting online chat last night with my neighbor/petsitter/pagan-but-not-currently-practicing.  I asked her if she had social anxiety, to which she responded that she does with a few people.  Laughs were shared between us when I asked, and she revealed, that I make her grow increasingly nervous every minute that we share a physical space.  She said that it's important for her to "get a read on people", and she simply can't get a read on me at all.  In a way, it was wonderful affirming to hear that my protections work so well, but also a bit saddening that those same protections interfere with my ability to connect with others.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I can't tell you if it's something that began when I first took steps on the path or whether it's always been the case, all I know is I recognise it now. People never seem to be able to get completely comfortable in my presence. I've made efforts in becoming an approachable person (on bad days I can be very shy and avoidant- so automatically unlikable) but even if I tick all the right boxes there's that silent space in first impressions being filled up with something I can't pin point. Even when the first impression is finally shrugged off there's a bit of an after taste. I mean, it could just be me. There's a few things about my appearance, accent and manner that are uncommon.

--

If one subscribes to "A witch is born, not made" theory, I can see the 'It Factor' always being inherent to how others perceive us, even if the It Factor is dormant prior to embracing one's Path.  

 

I know what you mean about trying to make yourself more approachable.  I've done the same, with disappointing results, and my appearance/accent/mannerisms are as average and unremarkable as can be.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I guess I sometimes intimidate people as I don't play along with the usual games and they can't easily define me or understand where I'm coming from. I'm aware of my personal weaknesses but in general I tolerate little bullshite. I'm an empath as much as I am an introvert, and that combination tends to confuse people, as I'm big on understanding and being able to relate, but very reserved about bonding with people. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I tend to have the opposite effect.... most people see me as very "sweet" and easy-going, which for the most part I am, lol. I've always been an optimist and for the most part am a happy person. It does tend to confuse people when I do lose my temper, though. But sometimes that confusion on their part is a good thing, lol.

 

M

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Losing temper, yes that's a good one, it only happens here when someone is seriously crossing my boundaries, but when it happens I turn from very much easy-going into sudden intolerable fury. ;)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Have to wonder if its some kind of predator-prey type instinct. I do know that shields, protections and our energy surrounding us in general can have an effect on how people perceive us. I think its similar to how you can sense when someone's a policeman or army etc.

 

Its that sense of looking beyond a persons "mask" that makes them nervous and intimidated. That there secrets might not be so secret.

 

I lost a friend because she said I kept causing her to talk about things she didn't want to talk about and she couldn't handle the truths that came out. Like I was "making" her talk. Another friend hates it when she sees in my eyes that I already know what she wants to tell me. Perhaps its things like this I am not doing on purpose that intimidate others.

 

My main issue is that people can read my eyes very easily and the openess unnerves them.

Edited by Gyreleaf

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Perhaps it would be best to block or disguise these things when you are with your friends? "Hide in plain sight" as they say?

 

M

Edited by Michele

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm shy and a bit of an introvert by nature so it hasn't been something I've really noticed but I have had people tell me that I'm "different" or that I "don't quite fit in" over and over again in my life.  And usually as a compliment but it always stung a little.  Even when I'm with a group of friends I always feel a little on the outside.  It's a chicken and the egg thing - did I continue on this path because I felt like an outsider or am I an outsider because I'm on this path and make others uncomfortable?  Either way it can be a little lonely.  But I wouldn't give it all up to be "normal" either. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Yes I do make people nervous. I think what helps to feed the anxiety is that I'm a private person; I just don't normally discuss that stuff. I think people know that I'm a witch on some level. It's kinda like the elephant in the room...nobody wants to ask me about it. I even make my hubby nervous. Maybe it has something to do with increased energy.

 

Heck the other day my hubby says "when you get up in the morning the devil says oh shit...she's awake!".

  • Upvote 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I noticed that most of us are kind of shy and introverted. I wonder is that a witch thing you think? But that actually makes me feel at home here bc I know that I'm around people that are similiar to me. I am Very shy and introverted I think it comes from my childhood though wasn't pleasnt.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Yeah, I intimidate most people.  I think it's a cross between my fashion sense and who I am at my core.  I love 'biker chic' and boots.  I carry myself well.  I'm also ready to throw down on a moment's notice - if necessary (which, ironically, makes those types of people punk out and slink away).  I have a 'thing' about bringing out honesty in others - their mouth start moving and they can't believe what comes out of it.

 

Now, this is the weird part - animals, children and the elderly just love me.  Those that are fully secure in who they are - we get along fabulously. 

 

I don't know if it's the older I get, the more secure in who I am or the more strongly I embrace my Path but it keeps getting more intense.  You ain't alone in this AW.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Izzie , that was grand - " She's awake " !!!!! :vhappywitch:

 

Nabu

 

p.s. Happy Day to ya

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I don't make people nervous. I come off as very, very laid back & easy going. That said, I'm a bit of an introvert and don't go out of my way to meet new people much.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Introverted and shy are not equivalents of nor complementary to each other. I'm introverted big time but at the same time I'm not shy or inhibited at all. LOL Don't know why any human trait or characteristic should be any more "witchy" than others anyway, but maybe that's just me. I guess I'm an opinionated and outspoken introvert... I love my solitude but couldn't live without socializing and sharing ideas.

Edited by Horne

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Well some people are both I'm one of them! As far as shy or introverted as a witch trait It was kind of a joke! But there are a lot of witches that are loners because of the fact they feel very different and feel people won't understand them. I am very opinionated myself especially on this subject! This is where people see other people that are different as they are. As wrong because they are not like them. I have a problem with this because I don't go in public that much anymore because people see a guy that shakes and studders  and can't walk instead of just asking what is wrong with them thy make assumptions. Like talking to you like your mentally handy capped or stare and whisper to each other about you! That is what I have to deal with everyday that I go into public. Never thinking that I Am a intelligent person and at one time I was no different then they are.  :twisted_witch:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Izzie , that was grand - " She's awake " !!!!! :vhappywitch:

 

Nabu

 

p.s. Happy Day to ya

You too!!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest monsnoleedra

Well some people are both I'm one of them! As far as shy or introverted as a witch trait It was kind of a joke! But there are a lot of witches that are loners because of the fact they feel very different and feel people won't understand them. I am very opinionated myself especially on this subject! This is where people see other people that are different as they are. As wrong because they are not like them. I have a problem with this because I don't go in public that much anymore because people see a guy that shakes and studders  and can't walk instead of just asking what is wrong with them thy make assumptions. Like talking to you like your mentally handy capped or stare and whisper to each other about you! That is what I have to deal with everyday that I go into public. Never thinking that I Am a intelligent person and at one time I was no different then they are.  :twisted_witch:

 

I'm an introvert by nature but can force myself to be an extrovert when required.  Because of being an introvert I am often seen as being shy because I choose to keep to myself which further suggests the shy assumption.  Then figure I am also a loner by nature which further supports the assumption people make of being shy.

 

I can relate to the stares and such as I am now disabled and have to use a cane to walk.  Have seizure like shakes and legs that tend to drop out on me.  Yet in many ways I'm looked at like..We'll your different yours is a result of your time in the military and injury.  People listen to me talk and know right off i'm retired military not counting I tend to wear a hat that supports POW's, retired Navy or some such thing.  A few, especially family or close friends know while able I was on the fire dept so put my butt in harms way a number of times.

 

As a norm I don't do things to draw attention to myself, part of the old school and family protection stuff.  More of the He Who knows says not, He who says Knows not and it is better so.  If I get any type of reaction its if I am drawn into or initiate a conversation then people say my eyes become bottomless voids and they get a headache from the intensity of the energy.  Needless to say I don't just get drawn into those to often. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Oh thank you for that old good one monsnoleedra...He Who Knows says not. There is an old saying my dad's father used to tell me which is similar, "He who knows the least talks the most." I have tried to abide by that, and as such, I am pretty close-mouthed. I try not to draw attention my way, but somehow people look, stare, and whisper. If for some reason I have to interact with someone, a teller at the bank, a co-worker, a cashier, I have found that I am met with nervous laughter and averted eyes.  I freak people out, no question.  The kids I work with love me, and that part of the thread responses I truly relate with as well. 

 

For a long time I just thought it was my height that made people scared.  I am exceptionally tall for a woman, and have always been tall.  My son is the same and has a similar affect on people. At age 5 he reached 4'6'', much like myself.  By the time I was 12, I was 5'10'', and still had another 3 inches before I stopped growing.  About the first year of high school when other kids started catching up to me i realized that it was not just my size but the affect I had on people was attributed to something entirely different.  The more I practiced, the more I learned and stronger my abilities became the stranger people acted around me.  I have had some weird times at Texas Hold Em tournaments! 

 

Now that I am older and have not only matured as a person (wife, mother, witch...all the roles that one fulfills as they age can pile up into a mountain), but have matured as a practitioner and witch, I have noticed the affect to be much more pronounced. I don't know if anyone else has noticed this but it seems to me that the weaker, or more closed, the mind of the person with whom I am interacting, the more likely they are to become mealy-mouthed and uncomfortable.  The general sheeple of such organizations as the pentecostal or evangelical Christian churches that are so prevalent in my area are the ones to whom I am referring...they bristle at my presence.  It seems like the bank tellers, etc. that I have to interact with are all of said religious bent also, making it uncomfortable (for them) when I decide to go out and run errands to say the least.

 

Thanks a lot for starting this thread ArcticWitch, I had wondered for a long time if I was the only one in the world who felt this way, or if it was some regional thing (Bible belt and all that).  Knowing that so many others on similar paths have experienced this lets me know that is more universal, which is somehow comforting.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have found that my practice makes it easier to relate to others. I think this is because my practice focuses on healing, and since healing starts with the self and is usually based in compassion, caring and empathy, those qualities help me connect more with others. I think if my practice was pushing me away from community, then I am working my practice incorrectly somehow.... Because in many ways a healer is a servant to the community. My experience may be different then others because of the healing focus though..

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have found that my practice makes it easier to relate to others. I think this is because my practice focuses on healing, and since healing starts with the self and is usually based in compassion, caring and empathy, those qualities help me connect more with others. I think if my practice was pushing me away from community, then I am working my practice incorrectly somehow.... Because in many ways a healer is a servant to the community. My experience may be different then others because of the healing focus though..

---

I do have strong healing abilities, but I have to consciously "flip the switch" on that capacity to have a healing presence/energy with living things around me (people, animals, plants).  When I want or feel the need to connect with others, I do indeed feel that I'm able to do so much more effectively since I started on my Path.  But my new[ish] "default mode" is what appears to be making people uncomfortable.  Because making the average person I come into contact with feel nervous isn't something that truly bothers me, I'm at the point in my Journey that I don't feel it's necessary to change my behavior simply to accommodate others' sense of wellbeing.  An alternative interpretation is that making people uncomfortable can be healing in itself, because perhaps it will prompt them to evaluate themselves as to the reasons someone (like me, or anyone else) would make them feel that way- and inspire some positive growth. :)

 

As always, you've certainly given me some food for thought, travsha!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

People usually say they feel comforted by me... Which I like.

 

When I was younger, I used to be more rebellious and punked out - freaked way more people out back then. Seems the more I practice, the more ease I have relating to others though. I take that as a good sign my practice is moving in the right direction. Imagine a healer who made everyone uncomfortable? That wouldn't work!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Sign in to follow this  

×
×
  • Create New...