When I got off work today I was consumed by an overpowering urge to go to one of the local cemeteries. Usually I pass by it on the way to work. I always feel its presence, or perhaps it's the presence of the denziens therein. Whatever it is, it was pulling me towards it. As I pulled in, I noticed that a burial service had conculuded—the staff was breaking down the tent and chairs, and there was a backhoe and a large mound of dirt. I paid my greetings to the cemetary guardian and whispered my purpose for the visit (to obtain some dirt from a soldier's grave for protection purposes). As soon as I turned to the first grave I heard a loud 'YES!' in my head. I didn't want to seem like some weirdo to the living workers, so I wandered around the cemetery for a bit, reading the other headstones (all of them were metal plates in the ground). I felt like I should go and talk to them, but I didn't (in retrospect I think this was a mistake).

When the workers began filling in the hole (far away from the first grave), I returned to the soldier's grave, paid him and thanked him, and took the dirt into my hand. Then I walked away. As I returned to the car, I felt the overpowering urge again, this time to turn around. However, mindful of the risks, I ignored it best I could, turned the car around, and went home. When I got home I performed an egg cleansing, but the finger I used to scratch up the dirt still tingled, and no matter how long I pressed the egg against it the sensation remained.

I'm doing this work for a friend, she asked for help with her ex, who is relentlessly stalking her (again). She asked for me to do anything to keep him away from her, but I feel that there are two components to this--protection for her, and binding him to keep him down. There is also a child involved, so I don't feel comfortable in doing a heavy curse on the Ex, because of his mental state (drugs; also he refuses to let her go and spends most of his energy in making her life hell throught the courts).

As for the cemetery, the pulling comes and goes. I hear a name in my head again and again from the first cemetery I visited in town, however, I have not had a chance to return there.

I've begun to "listen" at night again, now that I've acclimated more to my work schedule. I roam around the house late at night, restless. I cannot sleep and I do not remember my dreams. I'm trying to dig myself out of a hole, the hole of feeling "stuck". Hopefully doing this work will help jumpstart my path again. At least I can fulfill the promise I made to her, and then I can take on the next work that whispers to my heart.