I was told I couldn't possibly be Pagan (you keep using that word... I do not think it means what you think it means) and choose not to have children... because I wouldn't be able to experience the mother aspect of goddess.
First of all, I'm an atheist. I don't believe in any deities.
Second, even if I did believe in a deity... I wouldn't place a gender on it.
This person went on to tell me that by choosing not to have children, I'm choosing destruction. Having children is choosing life and creation, and by denying my maternal destiny, I'm choosing destruction.
Oh boy. There are many ways to nurture life and be creative other than having children. I grow plants and care for animals. I am nurturing to my husband. I draw, paint, crochet, and write. I am not a walking uterus and motherhood is not the one-size-fits-all destiny of every woman on this planet! For some it is a blessing and something they always knew they wanted for themselves... and that's wonderful! But that is not the case for me. (And all that aside, there is nothing wrong with destruction. Without it, there could be no life.)
But gee... I guess he must know better than I what I can and can't be.